A 'Dom' v 'Top'
A Top is a person who takes the “active” role in the bedroom. Giving the orders, dishing it out, etc. While the “bottom” takes the “passive” role, obeying the orders, taking what the Top dishes out, etc. A Dom is someone whose emotional and ...
24th July 2019 (Updated 15th October 2021)
Views : 4288
Punishments
It is important to ensure that punishments not only warrant the infraction but also are handled ASAP. Letting punishments go and addressing them even a week after is not good for a healthy D/s relationship. The submissive should not have to remind their Dominant of a punishment ...
30th July 2017 (Updated 15th October 2021)
Views : 3442
Dominant’s are human
For those that are new to this lifestyle I want to point out something to you all which I see day in day out that is yet another misconception out there and that is Dominant’s being viewed as “superior beings” superior in the sense that they are perfect, can ...
30th July 2017 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 1837
Doms vs Female Abusers: Spotting Posers and Predators…
There seems to be some widespread misconceptions or confusion about the true nature of the relationship between a Dominant and a submissive. I am writing this article so novice subs have a way of discerning the potentially dangerous, abusive posers from the legitimate Doms so ...
27th February 2016 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 5913
Being her Dom, even when you're not being a Dom
If you've ever been in a scene or witnessed one where the Dominant and submissive move in unison with one another and the scene becomes a tangible, living testament of their understanding of each other, it can be amazing, inspiring and beautiful beyond words. But when you're ...
29th November 2015 (Updated 15th October 2021)
Views : 3103
If you want a Dominant - Earn It
There is a popular .gif on Fetlife. It usually has a picture of a female in some form of bondage or a submissive pose, with the words "If you want my submission - Earn it." This .gif always makes me consider a scenario where a submissive tells this to her new Dominant and then ...
1st October 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 7749
30 Rules For A Modern Gentleman
1. Be gentle to the fairer sex, it’s in the name.2. Dress well no matter the occasion.3. Pride is dangerous, be careful.4. Be humble, be grateful5. Opening the door or giving up a seat for a lady isn’t upfor discussion.6. Work hard, that is if you want to own anything ...
1st October 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 2743
How to be a Dom : The Dominant beginners guide in 12 simple-ish steps
Step 1: Understand what a Dom is A Dom is someone who wishes to express dominance over someone’s life. A Top is someone who wishes to play a dominant role during a scene. People can be either or both. But understand that being a Dom is a huge responsibility, and your ...
1st October 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 58013 | Comments : 1
Things an insecure Dom will say
Things an insecure Dom will say that will turn even a Good Girl submissive into a Brat asking, "What the fuck?" More so than any toy you can pull out of your bag, more important than any technical skill you'll pick up, confidence is what separates the ones who can Dominate from ...
1st October 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 3667
Female Language
My 20 Rules to the female language, sadly has taken a life time for many men to understand and few to have learned it early on. #1… If you should find her looking at your mouth, then give her a breath stealing kiss. #2… If she pushes you or hits you like a dummy, ...
1st October 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 2442
Top 10 Signs He’s an Asshole, Not a Dominant
For all the single submissives out there looking for love, I get it. No really, I do. You yearn to submit to a Dominant, and it seems like finding the right one is nearly impossible. Many of you will take what you can get because you don’t think you deserve better. Others ...
20th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 2220 | Comments : 1
Training For The Modern Master
Let me list some ideas I use to manage a 24/7 LifeStyle. These are things that I have picked up along the way to provide me with a stable and safe environment. When I started into LifeStyle it was very clear to me that I needed some way to achieve my desires and supply for my ...
10th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 3209
So what is a good Dominant?
What follows is my opinion and in no way states that Mine is the only path to follow, there are many differing opinions out there and I suggest you seek them all. I use the male pronoun as I am MALE though a Dom or Domme is male or female.What should a Dominant be? The question ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 2557
10 Considerations for Aspiring Dominants from the Society of Janus
1. Be PatientUntil you enter into a relationship with a submissive, you have no right to order him/her around. Give your sub, time to get to know you and what you are like. Finesse and subtlety are major elements of dominance. Similarly, strength and gentleness go hand in hand. ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 2066
10 Things a Dominant needs from a Submissive
1. Know your Responsibilities.Dominants have responsibilities. We hear a LOT about that in our community. We have the responsibility to be forgiving and understanding. We have the responsibility to be strong and independent. We have the responsibility to be wise and patient, ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 6654
Seven Pillars of Dominance
- A dominant is a ruler, but never a tyrant. But to rule requires understanding, and understanding requires humility.- A dominant has pride, but never arrogance. But pride requires dignity, and dignity requires humility.- A dominant commands respect, but never fear. But respect ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 4010
How to Interview a Dom/Master Prospect
Your prince is out there, seeking you, hungering for you, wondering where you are. But crouching between you and him are dozens of frogs and trolls. A few of these are even handsome and well-spoken. And you must wade through them, trying not to get slimed or bitten, before reaching ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 2353
So you want to be a Dom
You've thought about it, you've fantasized about it, and you've decided that it's for you. All well and good. Now to take the theory into practice. There's a distance between wanting to be a dom and being a dom, though, and it pays to be aware that there's more involved than ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 2004
12 Traits of a Good Dominant
1. He declines being called Sir, Master or any other grandiose title from the start. Until a relationship has been agreed he knows he's a human being just like you, on the same level as you. He will owe you that respect and courtesy from the beginning. He declines being called ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 12080
What a Dom Should Do (Decent human being)
A dom should always look out for the best interests of their submissive - Not just a dom, any decent human being would do this.A dom should support their submissive - Not just a dom, any decent human being would do this.A dom should protect their submissive - Not just a dom, ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 1699
Dominance for Nice Guys!
"So you are a nice guy."You think that people should be treated with respect and courtesy' you find violence, particularly violence against women, reprehensible; you would never, under any circumstances, raise your hand in anger against someone you love. And now your partner ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 2145
Boy, you claim to be a Master/Dom?
True mastery is not mastering someone else. Any idiot with a strong will can dominate someone with a weaker will. True mastery is mastering oneself, in all aspects, and then guiding, not forcing, but guiding someone into full submission, so that that person longs for it wholeheartedly, ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 1532
Dominance and Self-Control
Recently I was asked by what I interpreted to be a young, or at a minimum immature, follower where he could find women willing to be tied up, controlled and made to do whatever he wanted like those portrayed by images on my blogs. I could only ruefully shake my head and respond ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 3462
New Subs Guide to Dominants
This article is written by an anonymous author so if you are the author of this article or you know who the author is, please let us know so that we are able to offer appropriate credit.The term ‘Acid Test’ is an old prospecting term. A powerful acid can dissolve ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 4570
Characteristics of a Successful Dominant
I have spent some time discussing with others in the lifestyle what makes a good dominant. What marks a true dominant from a player or wannabe? I have read every bit of material I could get my hands on. Through these discussions and research I have been able to compile the following ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 5031
A Dominant or a Boy?
"My sub has days when she gets especially bratty. She challenges me in public and over the phone. Humiliation is a hard limit for her, and since we do not live together it has become increasingly hard to punish her. Any recommendations are greatly appreciated. Thanks!" This ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 1638
I am a Dom not a ...
This is for all the women on this site who don't know the true definition of a Dom...Enjoy.Your numerous pics of your cleavage, vagina and various body parts do nothing for me.I am a Dom not a kinkster. I would rather see your smile.Showing pictures of you in sexual acts with ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 16th October 2021)
Views : 1797
An Open Letter to Doms
I don’t understand you. What is your goal, exactly? I mean, ultimately, what do you hope to accomplish? Having someone who bends to your will? Someone who will do anything you ask, please you any time you wish, and say “Yes, sir” to your every command?I’ll ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 15th October 2021)
Views : 1845
Seven Deadly Sins of a Dominant
1. Inconsistency - If a dominant is inconsistent in applying and checking up on his or her rules, it makes the submissive not know whether to bother following them or not, and if he or she is inconsistent in their expectations of the sub, the way they treat him or her, and how ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 15th October 2021)
Views : 2404
How To Spot A Dominant
How To Spot A Dominant There is no way to spot a Dominant at ten paces. Unfortunately many submissives, and particularly novices, are impressed by these superficial things, making it easy for Dominant fakers. Anyone can learn to swing a flogger, talk in BDSMspeak, and wear 13 ...
8th April 2015 (Updated 15th October 2021)
Views : 41546 | Comments : 2